Today I went to one of the trials of the Nuremberg Trials; I didn’t have the courage to go to the trial yesterday because it was one of the guards responsible for killing my mother and sister at a concentration camp. I made a promises the day I was free from the holocaust that I would attend the trial of at least one of my fathers murderers. He wasn’t my biological father; my mom got remarried after my biological father left her a year after I was born so I don’t remember him at all. I was 9 when she remarried Adah, I was furious with the idea of having a step father, I did everything possible to try to get rid of him but he was determined to make me like him and finally call him dad. I thought it was a temporary marriage that wouldn’t last very long until my sister Bettina was born. In the ghettos I wasn’t worried I thought it was actually better and safer for our community until we got on the trains packed with barley enough air to breath, that’s when I knew we weren’t safe we were in danger. When we arrived at the first concentration camp we were forced to split up in two lines of girls on one side and boys on the other, each line leading to two different crematory buildings. I panicked and screamed at the top of my lungs so he could hear “ I love you, Dad!” He smiled at me from ear to ear, that was the last time I saw him. I am now alone in the world with no one, I am living with a family in Poland who are very nice they have a daughter a little older than I am she is very extraordinary she talks to me and comforts me when I need it but still their not my family I want my mom, dad, and sister back, I want my life back the life I had before any of this started but this time I would see Bettina as my father and life would be even better than it was. My Poland family brought me to the Trial today at three o’clock; we sat all together on the hard, uncomfortable, brown wooden bench. The trial began right on time, when I looked to the side their he was a guard who worked in the crematory building the same crematory building my father died in, that guard was one of the responsible people who killed my father. He walked in with a pale face, looking at the people on the benches with an angered stare but when his eyes met mine he stopped, I stared at him with a death stare I felt like pouncing on him yelling out all the pain he caused me. I tried so hard to be calm and not cry but before I knew it a tear slid down my cheek, I couldn’t help but sob just looking at the mans face made me imagine my father being creamed like a wild animal with no feelings, it sickened me. Each second of the trial seemed like it lasted an hour I got so frustrated when the Nazi guard began defending himself, how could he possibly think that murdering helpless people is normal, that it doesn’t characterize him as evil. I wasn’t able to sit still, my legs kept shaking in frustration I was waiting to hear the sentence “You are going to be executed” but it seemed like it was never coming, until everything got quiet two hours into the trial that is when my hopes came true the judges talked among themselves and final they spoke the words I had been waiting for “You are going to be executed” that is all I heard every other gasp, crying, whisper around me seemed to disappear I just focused on that sentence. My eyes shut in relief because justice had been made, I took a deep breath exhaling all my exhaustion, and I smiled slowly showing only half of my white teeth. I was happy that I kept my promise to my father and that justice was made, but at the same time I was sad that I wasn’t ever going to hear my father’s voice again, I wasn’t going to be able to share my feelings with the family I grew up with. Despite my sadness towards my father’s death I knew deep inside he is still with me everyday. I know for sure he is happy with the way the trial went; I know for sure he is happy with me.
Love,
Ariella Rosenthal
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